List #1

I’ve been try­ing to start a new habit: Write a list at the begin­ning of every day.

Just that, no oth­er require­ments. Nice and sim­ple, plen­ty of room for cre­ativ­i­ty. Even top­ics that might not make one think of putting them in a list, abstract, strange, inap­pro­pri­ate, untruth­ful, exag­ger­at­ed. Just a morn­ing mind­ben­der. Here’s the first.

Favorite outdoor activities:

  • Using an axe
  • Chas­ing pedes­tri­ans
  • Chas­ing pedes­tri­ans with axe
  • Encas­ing ants and oth­er insects in amber col­ored jel­lo
  • Hang­ing pas­ta from trees in rev­er­ence to the F.S.M.
  • Har­vest­ing dig­ni­ty from nat­ur­al essences
  • On warm days after a dry spell, find­ing those lit­tle dried clumps of dirt that explode when you throw them
  • Burn­ing effi­gies of cor­rupt 19th cen­tu­ry politi­cians
  • Cre­at­ing a zen wood­chip gar­den
  • Spray­ing post car­ri­er with deer musk
  • Cre­at­ing ori­fices for Moth­er Nature

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